Decisions, days out, farewells & dating…

Hi all! Well I’m back from my break on the Kent Riviera, & fully recharged. What a thoroughly amazing few weeks I’ve had.  They were pretty intense, yet relaxed, and soooo busy!

My base for the first week was the stunning sleepy location of Tankerton.  Everything a English seaside should be & always was when i was a little girl.  I remember spending many happy summer holibobs in this area, and from the moment I parked the car and took my first breath of sea air all seemed right with the world.  I’m not ashamed to admit it brought a little tear to my eye.  The flat that was home for week one we as based right in the main high street & a stones throw from the seafront. Cosy, bright and clean – the perfect base.  After a long soak in the bath (novelty for me as I only have a shower now at home) I slept like a baby (well a quiet one!). 

Sammy the Seagull (not named by me I hasten to add, but a special little lady) & her crew were in fine squawk at 6am, so after a cuppa and a green smoothie it was time for a seafront run.  Tankerton is approximately 2km from Whitstable, so a perfect run distance there and back for me at the moment as I am slowly getting my distances back.   It really isn’t as easy as I hoped but I will get back up to 10k if it kills me (metaphorically speaking of course, that would be foolish). 

So off I set, sun shining, wind keeping me cool, a perfect perfect day.   I can’t remember the time I last felt so calm and relaxed, and dare I say it HAPPY! From nowhere the tears just started to pour from my eyes (thank god for sunglasses).  Sad? No, relief, Joy and calm.  

The next few days were spent catching up with some very special people, big & small, walks along the seafront, stone throwing, oyster eating, Chablis drinking and lots of special times.  Thank you to all who visited, I may not see you more than a few times a year but its always fun!

Tankerton made me feel at home.  The place, the wonderful friendly people, the fab cafes & bars, the wine shop (yes the wine shop) everyone wanted to chat and make me feel welcome.  Good honest people, enjoying life.  Made me sit back and wonder why I make life so complicated at times – it really doesn’t need to be.  One lovely lady in the tea room was serving a tapas platter with a glass of the best red wine I have ever tasted (yes yes, I know I have tried lots) for £8.99.  When i couldn’t eat it all, she wrapped up the block of cheese, packed me some olives & peppers & crackers so I didn’t have to cook that evening – good job as it was Great British Bake Off day!!  Kindness that really made me feel warm inside – or maybe it was the wine….

I had spent the day lying on the beach, just listening to the sea.  Eating crisps, dips and drinking tea out of a flask.  Perfect.  I get to travel to some of the most amazing places with work or with friends, but nothing felt so special as this did.  All in all it was a perfectly lovely day. 

Thursday came round and time to move onto a lovely seafront cottage in Herne Bay called Black Tulip Cottage, it truly is a beauty.  Big thanks to the owner for letting me stay.  Kindness is breeding it would seem…..I settled in nicely, and got an early night after a long soak in the tub ( I will use every bath I come across now).  It was needed as Friday was a tough one.

Friday.  Time for my closest friends and family to say goodbye to my beautiful parents.  I didn’t really know how I would react, or how the day would be.  Would anyone turn up?  Had I left it too long?  

Well, I still even now are gobsmacked.  I can not even begin to put into words what a beautiful and totes emotional day it was.  People came from miles away, and some near, but everyone made that day unforgettable.  People I haven’t seen for years, some since I was a kid.  We shares some stories, some tears, some laughs and some secrets.  I can not thank everyone enough, for all the texts, calls, cards, and those who came.  We finished the service with Gary Barlow’s song Let me Go.  Listen to the words, its exactly what we all felt.  Beautiful, exhausting and healing day.

The revelation of the day, which I knew a little bit of, is the truth behind my adoption.  For those of you who didn’t know I am adopted.  I always knew there was a story to it, as this was in the days that the adoption laws weren’t quite what they are today, and I know my parents looked after me before my official adoption.  Dad told a story where I had to see a family judge who asked me who I wanted to live with.  Dad had a bag of sweets under the table.  Never  in question!!!! Thats all I knew, and Im sure it wasn’t quite like that somehow, but I finally learnt the real story.  I won’t bore you all with the details, but my Mum and Dad basically rescued me from a horrible situation.  They came to visit me as a friend of the family knew I was in a place I shouldn’t have been.  They found me sitting on the floor in a nappy, with my so called carers throwing chips at me to feed me (certainly explains my obsession with chips).  I was severely malnourished and not being cared for properly.  There and then my Mum and Dad agreed to take me home with them a few days later.  They agonised over that decision, as it was without official permission, so they were risking everything.  But, friends backed them and I was in my new loving home within 48 hours.  

Why am I telling you all this?  Because it completes my story.  It proves even more how lucky I was to have those 2 amazing people in my life.  So thanks to all that assisted that, and to my 2 guardian angels – you had my back from day 1 till you left, but I know you still have me covered.  I am truly blessed and bloody unstoppable with those 2 around so watch out!!!!

The weekend was a quiet one spent sleeping, eating, walking and chilling out with one of my closest friends.  We had a lovely day out in Whitstable, Tankerton and a lazy Sunday in Folkestone at a beautiful restaurant called Rocksalt – please visit if in town!! Its a Mark Sargeant place, but was truly stunning.  Just what I needed.  Thoroughly spoilt and looked after and I can’t thank them enough.  THANK YOU!!!!!

As they left I realised its now time to get back to normal.  Get back home, finalise legal Spain stuff and get a house in Tankerton as soon as possible.  It will be a second home, somewhere for us all to share more special times together and a bolt hole for me to keep me sane once life gets back to full speed.  So off I went to register with the estate agents, and get planning – watch this space!

Another thing I needed to get back to is finding a bloke.  Well one thats sane, single and up for enjoying life.  Someone to share things with now I have my life back.

Now, some of my friends will probably choke on their tea or wine, but I registered with a dating website.  The whole dating website thing makes me cringe.  Whatever happened to the days where you would go out, have a drink, and a lovely (well sometimes) bloke would come and chat to you and ask for your number? Or am I just getting old! Maybe because we used to go out to pull, and now we go out to catch up with our friends rather than speak to others!!

So here goes.  I registered with one, filled out my profile,picked the kind of guy I would like to meet – no more than 7 years older than me (god that number was scary!), hard working, likes to go out, holidays, you get the drift.  I finished it all and stuck up a half decent photo of me and made myself sound fairly normal – and it seems that is where I went wrong.

Day 1 – e mail appears – Hey, you have a new fan!! exactly the kind of rubbish I expected, but still made my heart sink.  But stick with it Al, you never know….Until I opened the email.  Jim, 68 yrs old would love to meet you! I bet he would! Is that even legal?!?!?!? Delete.

Day 2- I get 4 new fans – all over 50.  And before you ask, yes I did say no older than 46 on my profile.  Obviously that was too much to ask for!  

This continued for several days, but then I got a very well written, polite email from a guy.  Could be of interest.  After a little chat we agreed to meet for lunch.  So off I went, having not ‘dated’ for a few years a little nervous.  I had agreed to meet Mr X outside a local bar.  As i walked towards the bar I was pleasantly surprised, seemed quite good looking, good vibe.  As I went to say Hi, he walked away.  Then someone tapped me on the shoulder & said “Hi Alison, nice to meet you”.  Narrowly averted disaster….. note to self, wait for someone to talk to you first……..

He was nice enough.  Not as nice as the guy I thought was my date.  He seemed kind, hard working, liked eating out (well when he could as seemed to be intolerant to every food group), blah blah blah.  I can get on with anyone, chat for England (as you all know), but when he announced that 10pm was his bedtime every night except Saturdays where he stays up till 12, I knew it was time to leave.   

I’ll keep trying.  Or maybe I won’t.  So if anyone has any single friends who would like to meet me, just let me know!! (Not holding my breath here…).  Until then, I am fine as I am.  I have a busy month travelling, the weddings of 2 of my closest friends and general loving life.

Anyway enough of my ramblings, off to see if I have any fans today, have a lovely week all!!!!

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5 thoughts on “Decisions, days out, farewells & dating…”

  1. Well….. So far this morning you’ve brought tears to my eyes and made me snort out my coffee, thanks xxx. Your parents sound like such special people i’m tearing up again. It’s just not bloody fair is it? Thankfully you did have 30 plus years and memories with them. And if it’s any comfort they obviously touched so many lives for so many people to want to come and celebrate their lives and say goodbye.

    and on a very shallow note, love the toe nail polish xx

  2. Wonderful blog Alison, you really are funny. I love reading your stories of your life, sad at times no good reading it without a tissue or two though. It sounds as if you are having a lovely time and it is lovely how your friends etc that didn’t know your Mum and Dad have realised what amazing people they were, you must have been so proud that so many people attended the Service but all who did know them would not have been surprised.
    I had a great laugh about the Dating Agency, where do these people come from? As if you would be interested in a 68 year old 😆😆😆😆
    I hope you do meet somebody nice but don’t be too hasty as they are not all what they seem, i am not talking through experience but i do know people that have met potential partners this way.
    Go on having fun and i will wait patiently for the next update.
    Lots and lots of love xxxx

  3. Bear in mind that George Clooney is over 50 and Brad Pitt’s heading that way too – oh, just thought – you don’t live in tinsel town xxx

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